“It is really hard, unless you’ve been actively practicing it, to be curious when you’re not feeling safe.” ~ Ashley Kirsner
Enough with the polite, front parlor pablum of the past — and onward toward rich discussion, mindful discourse, self-disclosure, and – dare I say it? – curiosity!
Wanting to do something about the epidemic of loneliness among her peers, Ashley Kirsner set out to find a way to help people build their conversational and self-revelatory muscles.
Enter Skip the Small Talk.
Using techniques grounded in research that offer people the tools they need to interact more genuinely and feel more connected to each other, Skip the Small Talk hosts gatherings (both virtual and in person) that help people interact more genuinely and feel more connected to each other, in the events — and beyond.
We talked about lessons Ashley learned about vulnerability and connection while serving on a suicide hotline, sharing internal states, revisiting our own stories and idea of ourselves, counteracting negativity bias, handling stress with mindfulness, building trust to make room for curiosity, using feedback to inform practices — and appreciating you just can’t improve a cockroach with ice cream.
The holidays are coming. Try these practices: (1) Don’t self-isolate. Lower the barriers to getting out, so you can be with others in whatever small way works. (2) Be honest with others that maybe the holidays are a little stressful for you — you’ll likely hear they feel the same way! (3) Try asking, “what was that like for you?” as an elegant, easy follow-up question to keep conversations more meaningful.
People report… that the truth they end up discovering at our events ends up being a lot more hopeful than what they might come in assuming.
Listen to Ep. #306: Skip the Small Talk, with Ashley Kirsner
Ashley Kirsner is Founder and CEO of Skip the Small Talk.
If you enjoyed this connectivity conversation, you might like these C2BC Classics: Curiosity & Dating, with Tim Molnar; Ten Thousand Friends, with Rob Lawless; & Networking, with Dana Theus.
Theme music by Sean Balick; “Are We Loose Yet” by Bodytonic, via Blue Dot Sessions.
You can subscribe to Choose to Be Curious on Apple Podcasts and Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.
